Every human being needs to feel loved. It is a basic human need that gives us the feeling of security and safety. A person needs to feel love and belonging in order to grow.
I think the perfection of love is that it’s not perfect.Taylor Swift
There are many different types of love:
- Romantic Love
- Love for family members
- Love for friends
- Love for pets
- Love for humanity
It is important to feel and express your love for others. It is a critical emotion throughout human existence but it definitely changes throughout our life as we age. When we are young, looking for love is more of a romantic sense. This comes from the animal instinct that we need to procreate and keep our race alive. As we age, these feelings may mellow and our feelings of love may grow into the instinctual love of caring for children.
The best thing to hold onto in life is each other.Audrey Hepburn
There are many ways we can express our love to another person. In Gary Chapman’s book, these are referred to as the five ‘love languages.’
The main ‘love languages’ people use are:
- Giving gifts: This might include buying flowers or chocolates – physical items intended to please your partner and show you’ve been thinking about them.
- Carrying out kind acts: This could be something like cleaning the car for your partner or picking up the shopping. Little (or big!) gestures to make them happy.
- Spending quality time together: This could be putting aside a whole evening to spend in each other’s company so you can really reconnect.
- Physical touch: This could be walking along holding hands, giving hugs, receiving a neck massage. Sensual gestures to make you feel physically closer together.
- Saying nice things to each other: This could be paying compliments: ‘your hair looks nice’, ‘I really like you in that suit’, ‘you’re a really talented singer’ or just affirmations of how you feel about each other.
It is important to recognize which of these actions make you feel loved. It is also important to know which of these makes your partner/family/friend feel loved. You may be giving a gift to someone thinking that it is an expression of your love only to find out that his/her love language is spending time together. He/she would experience your love much better if you took a walk on the beach together.
Today is my 60th birthday and I have been inundated with family and friends’ expressions of their love for me. I am filled with gratitude for each and every one of them in my life. Whether it was a text, phone call, flower delivery, or gift, each and every one is heart-felt and appreciated. I am so blessed.
The best and most beautiful things in this world cannot be seen or even heard, but must be felt with the heart.Helen Keller